Monday, May 19, 2008

Monkey Disaster's Friday Question

The witty and sagacious Mr. Moe tries to post a question on his blog each Friday--sort of a "talk amongst yourselves" moment. I like this one a lot, so I pose it all to you, along with my answer:

"Congratulations! Hollywood Pictures is making a movie of your life. We'll get to things like casting, treatment, genre, and musical score later. But short term there is a more pressing issue: toy tie-in. A little giveaway item to promote the film version of you. Available with any meal. Production needs to get started right away.

Your job is to design the toy. WHAT DOES THE TOY FROM THE MOVIE OF YOUR LIFE LOOK LIKE AND WHAT DOES IT DO? Keep in mind it needs to be pretty simple and cheap. Still, it should capture the essence of you, or at least the you character from the film. And please describe how the toy is played with. BONUS QUESTION: At which restaurant is your toy distributed?

I'll go first:
The toy me is seated on a couch with a laptop computer. The computer screen is blank. Above my head is a plastic thought balloon saying "DEADLINES!!" in creepy gloomy letters. Around the couch are children in pajamas who are not going to bed. When you pull a little lever, my hand reaches up to my hair and pulls on it in stressed out fashion while the pajamaed children punch each other in the head.
The toy is available only at Paseo, a Caribbean restaurant in Seattle's Fremont neighborhood. Negotiations to distribute it at Dixie's in St Paul fell through.

So once more:
At which restaurant is your toy distributed?"

So, here's mine:
1. Toy should be like the Nancy Pearl doll, only I want removable accessories, so I can go from mild-mannered, distractible college professor to funky way cool woman-about-town. Accessories will tend to fall off or not fit quite right, and hair will never lie the way it's supposed to. Key accessory: venti Starbucks cup with stains that match those on outfits.
2. Starbucks, of course. Because they've gotten enough of my money since adolescence, and I want a little back. And I'm sure this would be a HUGE seller. Very aspirational, no?

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