Spamalot

I always like to take a quick glance at my spam folder in Gmail before banishing all those promises of greater length and girth (and, apparently, the ability to make my girlfriend even happier than she already is) to the great digital dustheap. And so, there I saw it: an oldie but a goodie. What I like about this particular version of the Nigerian scam is its honesty: he found me "some where over the internet" (way up high?), and--o remarkable coincidence--his client and I share the same surname. Along with millions and millions of other Americans.

Oh, and finding me gave him great joy. And that's what I'm here for, really.

"Dear Susan M. Adams,

My name is Azreel Khalmizam a legal practitioner with A.Khalmizam & Associates in Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia.

I found your contact/profile some where over the internet and it gave me the greatest joy,that you are the one I have been looking for.Whom I strongly believe could execute this transaction with me.And being more positive that with your capability,that this transaction of transferring US$18,000,000.00 will be successfully accomplished.

My purpose of contacting you is for you to help secure the funds left behind by my late client,to avoid it being confiscated or declared unserviceable by the Finance House.Where this fund valued (US$18,000,000.00) Eighteen Million United State Dollars deposited by my client before his death in November 2004.

You might be wondering why am I communicating with you,believe it or not it is simply because you and my late client have the same surname.Though this is coincidental,I strongly believe,you could help me in the task which is the distribution of my late client¢s funds."