Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Affirmations

So, I've always been a total cynic about affirmations. I mean, really--cloying sayings that are supposed to improve my self esteem? Really?

So, when my very smart therapist recommended them as a strategy for dealing with job interview anxiety, I thought, okay, I'll give 'em a try. And a few months later, I finally got around to it.

So, in addition to the usual "I am strong," "I am beautiful" sorts of affirmations, I've got some good "I can" and "I will" statements:
I can let go of fear.
I can ask for what I want.
I can love myself for who I am.

I will ask for what I want.
I will take a new risk each day.

I'm also working hard at limiting the whole negative self-talk thing. In addition to the usual "shut the f*** up" response--which is really quite effective--I've started noticing the flip side of my flaws. Because it seems that frequently, the things I don't like about myself are just Side B of the things that I do.

Like the thin skin. Yeah, really thin skin. Easily hurt, quick to cry, slow to recover. But you know, I'm also very sensitive to others' needs, not just my own. And I'm quick to defend them--even folks I may be in competition with.

But that's another story.

So, final affirmation for today:
I can love my Side B's along with the Side A's.

Oh, and last week, I went to two different social events by myself--where I knew no one. I won't say I had the best time ever, but not bad.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Tim is all about affirmations, his little note cards are in the shower, in the office, and in his car. I'm not as big a believer, but I read a great book, about loving the Imperfect Me. Now Tim says affirmations are about who we want to be with no negatives, but my affirmations are about the "B side". Loving me, warts and all.